“Takin’ Care of Business”

There's not a traveler alive that won't tell you one of biggest concerns while traveling is finding a baño, toilet, latrina, toalett, or loo. It doesn't matter the language, whether you can ask for a restroom in the native tongue or you just use sign language, being Good to Go takes on a whole different meaning when you need one.

In trekking the globe with fellow explorers, we have enjoyed the luxuries of toilets so nice there were attendants to assist to us to, well, a hole in the ground. We have pushed open stall doors to be confronted with the eastern squat version, and waited in a much longer line to enjoy the comforts of the western sit version.

As females, our mothers instructed us to "hover" but as handicapped accessible toilets get taller, we short legged girls almost need a step stool to just take care of business. I realize that is way too much information, but I'm thinking of that hilarious email that circulates every so often about the lady that describes her trip into the stall with her purse hung around her neck because there is no hook on the door, her head pushing against the door because there is no latch on the door, and digging through pockets and calling to neighbors because there is no tissue in the stall. The thing is, it's not funny-we all have been there. So your travel tip for this week is toilet training.

#1. Always carry tissues. Next to your medications (especially if they are water pills), the most important thing to have on your person when traveling is toilet paper substitute. Male or female, there have been times we all have paid paper money for a length of tissue. It was either that or used the paper money itself, so another tip is carry small bills.

#2. Always check to see if you have to pay to use the toilet (not uncommon in many countries) and be prepared with the right coins required. Don't be surprised to find a cashier in some counties. You pay the posted amount to get in and maybe a few squares of tissue. (I've always wondered how they decide how many squares you actually need.)

#3. I find it interesting that places that service toilets in a regular schedule, are the same places that offer neat seat covers and lots of paper products. The places that haven't seen a toilet brush since Elvis was alive never have those things. Being short legged, and a weak "hover", I find joy in those big tissue placemats to line the seat. They are so dang thin that the slightest breeze can blow them out of place along with the auto- flushers can suck them down, sans use.

( I know you can't believe I'm discussing this. Gosh, it's not like you don't know what I'm talking about.) A tip for using big tissue placemat seat covers- put them on sideways rather than longways like the cutout indicates. There is more paper to lap over and it's less likely to fall in.

#4. As far as advice on dealing with the eastern-squat-over-hole option, just know there will be no 'rest' in that room. I could suggest you gals start doing quad exercises now if you think that might be something you will be experiencing. It's humiliating enough to try to keep shoes and other wardrobe pieces dry only to have quivering quad muscles screaming "hurry up!" The best tip is to do what girls do best, go with a friend. Real friends will not only hold your purse, find you paper but can even get them to pull you to your feet if necessary.

Toilet training. Take a friend, take a picture, take in the different cultural experiences of everyday things. But#1 take tissues.